Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Rain

really hate getting soaked up under the rain. the soggy feeling, the chill...ugh! hate it.

the weather is getting a little more colder these days. Christmas is really here...

last night, i slept with the fan turned low. it was because i usually get awoken having chills in the wee hours of the morning. it felt real cold sleeping alone in a big room.

i remember the vagrants i saw sleeping on the streets when i went shopping in Divisoria. the sidewalks near the mall have become their home. the `tiangge' and makeshift booths and selling stalls have become their children's playground.

i saw another face of poverty. watching them eat dinner on the floor with a blanket as a roof over their heads was heartwrenching.

it really broke my heart. i mean, what kind of life do they have? what kind of future lies before them? these children are no older than 4 or 6. they are too young to be suffering that hard.

i even saw this baby on her mother's arms, so innocent she looked really dirty. know the so-called `taong grasa?`
how can these people manage living in such kind of situation? the children don't deserve any of these sufferings.

when i left the place, questions started to run in my head. why do they suffer? is that the kind of life they deserve? are they lesser humans compared to the lucky ones?

now i believe life is now a matter of luck.

if you were born well-off, then you're lucky. if you were born one of those who live in shanties, one of the beggars or the so-called squatters, then you're unlucky.

those people did not want the way they are. they did not have a choice before they were born. they were simply born that way. we can't even choose who we should be or choose the families to whom we were born to. either way, we are simply creations who simply take life's routes as predesigned by the One who created us.

we can only do so much but given the life that we have, i believe we should leave everything to fate even if we do our best.

Friday, December 02, 2005

biting off more than i can chew

a lot of things are going on in my mind right now. i tend to bite off more than i can chew.

three weeks more to go before Christmas day. but my shopping list sits around the corner, untouched for days. i was wishing hard i could make it before Christmas. i'm low on budget and i don't have enough savings for the gifts. but i've got a lot of plans in my head.

next year, i would be saving up more for school. there is no turning back this time. i need to go back to school, lest i want to live as ordinarily as a commoner. could not imagine that. the future seems bleak here in the Philippines and getting out of the country is the only possible way.

i want my car and my house, and there has got to be a way for me to have them. i'd die in my singlehood if i would not have them.

so, got to go back to work. i've got a lot of things to do.

later!